I went through a slump recently, just getting into some "performance" thinking, imagining I needed to do more or be more to really be a "good Christian." I was into the comparing game, examining myself in comparison with other people and feeling I came up short in many areas. This led to feelings of self-condemnation and withdrawal from spiritual thoughts.
And there in my muck, God ministered to me. He reminded me of such wonderful truths. He healed my thinking and threw out the lies of the enemy!
Here are some words He shared with me through a friend: "God has no agenda for you today. He has no expectations of you. There is no - as in zero - condemnation. Jesus smiles and laughs because He is so in love with you. He loves you no matter what you do."
God gave me a beautiful verse from Luke 15 that spoke directly to my needs. I had needed to know from God that He was still around, still loving me and being with me even though I felt like a failure. And I needed to know that I wasn't lacking or inadequate, because I kept comparing myself to others and feeling so much "less." He gave me a verse that was perfect for me in dealing with these troubling thoughts (thoughts which were lies from the enemy, by the way!):
Son (Daughter), you are always with me, and all that I have is yours."
Wow..First He calls me daughter..this makes me feel special and wanted. I love how God jumps over the faults and troubles and doubts which SEEM so big to us, and He goes right to our hearts and ministers LOVE. He ministers to our real need. When we get confused or whatever, He never sees our sins (it's been dealt with at the cross already!) - He sees His dear child who needs to be held and loved and reassured! He is so tender with us! I love how He continually delights in us!
Then He assures me that I'm ALWAYS with Him, no matter what my behavior, no matter how many times I get caught in the same tired legalistic lies, no matter whether I prayed this morning or not...He is still here with me and I am still with Him! He hasn't left me because my performance wasn't so great. He is committed to me and sticks with me, no matter what. I love the STABILITY of our relationship! I read a verse about that, it said, "My only hope is in Your steadfast love and faithfulness." He won't let me down - He will keep on loving me and being faithful to stay with me!
And He says that ALL that He has is MINE! I have such a rich inheritance, really have EVERYTHING in Christ! ALL of Christ is in me and mine! HE Himself is my peace, joy, hope, victory, strength, love, etc. Talk about adequacy! As it says in the Bible, "our adequacy is in Christ." Having Him, I have all the Father has to give, and it's wonderful. I'm not lacking or less than any other person.
When we end up in the gutter because of our confusion at the enemy's lies/attacks, God in grace is down there in the gutter with us, and He lifts us up out of the gutter! We were only in trouble in our mind, we were always free and safe in His arms, we just had a momentary memory glitch! He brings our minds back to clarity that all is well, and that during that whole time of confusion, He was right there with us, loving us, working to bring us to see the truth again!
I thank God for ministering GRACE to me in my confusion! He is so good..