"For when we begin to hate sin, and amend us by the ordinance of Holy Church, yet there dwelleth a dread that letteth us, because of the beholding of our self and of our sins afore done....And the beholding of this maketh us so sorry and so heavy, that scarsely we can find any comfort....For it is God's will that of all the properties of the blissful Trinity, we should have most sureness and comfort in Love: for Love maketh Might and Wisdom full meek to us.....He forgiveth our sin... right so willeth He that we forgive our sin."
Julian of Norwich (Ch. 73)
We hate sin. We don't want to do it. But we keep falling into it. So we keep confessing it, promising to do better, recommitting ourselves to God, trying to make up for our sin. And yet that just makes us focus on our sin even more, filling us with shame and self-hatred and fear that maybe we didn't confess enough or repent well or dedicate ourselves well enough, and maybe God hasn't forgiven us, maybe there is something between us and God and we are not completely "right" with Him. We feel worse and worse and can seem to find no comfort. We feel that we are just not good enough for God and that He may be displeased or angry with us. We may feel afraid of Him, afraid to approach Him because we feel something is off and we are not measuring up to the standard, are not clean enough. We may even feel there is a wall between us and God. We may feel like giving up, like we just can't "do" this Christian life well enough. Our good intentions of wanting to be good and trying to stop sinning have snowballed into this endless cycle of trying and then failure, confession, trying harder, failing again, feeling shame and condemnation, feeling far from God, and on and on.
But this is not what God has for us in the Christian life! He has for us a life of peace and joy, knowing that we are alright before Him no matter how many times we fail. He has for us a life of confidence knowing that Christ already took away all our sins at the cross and gave us His own righteousness, meaning that we are perfectly right with God and sinless in His eyes at all times. God doesn't want us to be focused on getting rid of or dealing with sin. He doesn't want us to focus on something He already got rid of! He wants us to focus on His love. That is what the Christian life is all about, a love relationship with God. His love is the ruling factor. We can be assured that God is perfect, infinite, unconditional love toward us at all times. This is a love that has already forgiven us of all the sins of our whole lifetime! This is a love that understands our struggles and never turns His back on us but supports us at every moment, whether we are standing or falling. This is a love that accepts us unconditionally whether we ever stop sinning or not. This is a love that is so wonderful and life-giving and transforming that it fills up every need we have for friendship and support and affirmation, and we find ourselves naturally being kinder, friendlier, gentler, more at peace, and more loving effortlessly just by being in the Presence of this Love!
Love has defeated sin in our lives already, and Love will bring that out without our efforts. Love will keep drawing our eyes away from our sin struggles and onto the One who loves us so much. All we need to do is let Love love us. We don't need to worry about trying harder, focusing on sin, feeling guilty or being sorry enough, confessing and repenting over and over, trying to make ourselves better, or condemning ourselves. We don't need to focus on sin or behavior improvement at all. God isn't focusing on that. God already forgave our sin and completely embraced us in love. So we can forgive ourselves of our sin and completely embrace ourselves in love. Love has cast out all our fears about sin, for Love has cast out sin and filled us with Love. So we can revel in this Love and enjoy our perfect relationship with God that is always there for us!
"Be kind and ·loving [compassionate; tenderhearted] to each other, and forgive each other just as God forgave you in Christ."
Ephesians 4:32 (EXB)
"For God took the sinless Christ and poured into him our sins. Then, in exchange, he poured God’s goodness into us!"
2 Corinthians 5:21 (TLB)
A Prayer: Thank You for dealing with sin so I don't have to. Thank You for Your love that changes everything!