"It is easy to be drawn strongly by some outward desire of the heart and to seem hapless against it. But in my spirit centre, where God is, I know my real desire is His will and He keeps His firm hold on me. A friend recently wrote of a strong desire for a certain thing: 'But in this I felt myself kept. This keeping made me angry at times, because I wanted to have my own way and I knew I could not. I knew that it could never be because it wasn't what the real me wanted.' Spirit and soul!"
When I first read this, I thought, "yeah right." This sure doesn't seem to happen to me. It seems I follow my feelings into sin all the time without being able to stop. Yet here was someone saying that their feelings wanted to go a certain selfish way, yet they themselves couldn't go that way because something was keeping them from doing so, from following those feelings. It didn't seem true in my experience - that is, until I experienced it!
Only a day or two after I read this quote, that very thing described above happened to me! I was having very irritable feelings and just thinking, "Oh well, I'm in a foul mood and have to just go with that"...and the next thing you know, I'm feeling fine, peaceful and loving again! I did nothing! I decided nothing! It was all HIM! It was the most gentle and beautiful thing! It was like the rising tide that inundates the shore. He rises up inside us and overcomes the evil thoughts and feelings with a will stronger than any feeling or thought. The real us doesn't want to sin but only chooses love. That's His nature within us and He will keep us! Amazing!
Another quote from the same article: "I totally enjoy the fact that He has me safely in hand, with the surges of the negatives temporarily flooding in, and spirit winning its battles over soul and body diversions so that I am 'kept by the power of God' and 'having all sufficiency in all things, abound unto every good work.'" (Norman Grubb)
It reminds me of the New Covenant promise: "I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh. I will put My Spirit within you and cause you to walk in My statutes, and you will keep My judgments and do them ." (Ezek. 36:26-27) It's wonderful and such a relief that He will CAUSE us to walk in His ways. I'm so glad He's taking care of what I could never handle - my walk! Grace means God does it all and we rest in Him!
With love,
