Trying To Keep The Law - A Testimony

It seems for most of my Christian life, I was literally obsessed with keeping the law.  I realized that law couldn't save me.  I saw that only Jesus could do that.  But I seemed to think that law could make me a better, more acceptable person now that I was saved.  I truly thought that was what the Christian life was all about - about me trying harder, doing more good and less evil, getting better, improving myself.

I managed to turn every single thing in my Christian life into a law.  Being filled with the Spirit, having faith, witnessing, Bible study, prayer, church attendance, overcoming sin, everything became something I was somehow supposed to "do" to make myself a better Christian.  Of course the problem with living by law (thinking we have to do something to get closer to God, be better, get blessed, make spiritual progress, or be more accepted by God) is that by law is the knowledge of sin (Rom. 3:20).  Law points out our sin and we become sin-conscious.  And another problem is that law condemns those who sin; it's the ministry of condemnation (2Co. 3:9).  So here I was trying so hard not to sin and yet seeing all this sin every time I failed to keep some rule or principle of the Christian life, and then feeling condemned because of it.  Scripture even says Law kills (2 Co. 3:6)!  Well, I certainly felt like it was killing me trying - and failing- to live by this self-improvement program I'd set up for myself.

It was a self-defeating cycle, for I would try to keep all these rules for Christian living in the hopes of sinning less, yet the Bible says the power of sin is the law (1 Co. 15:56)!  By trying to follow those principles and try to improve myself and resist sin, I was only stirring up sin and empowering it in my life!  I was trying hard to do better, failing, and feeling like I was a disappointment to God. I felt "far from God" and like I was letting Him down.  No matter how hard I tried to keep the rules, I couldn't do so, for the law only tells us what to do; it gives no power to actually do those things. I felt I was never good enough, never really acceptable to God.  Was this the Christian life?  If it was, I was a failure at it.  It was terrible living in this way, and my heart goes out to all who have suffered from a performance-based mindset. 

Then grace overwhelmed me and God showed me He accepted me just as I was and that at salvation, He'd given me the gift of righteousness - right and acceptable relationship with Him (2 Co. 5:21, Eph. 1:6)!  What a relief to find out I'd been acceptable to God all along.  I didn't need to try to improve myself in order to get more accepted or get more blessed or get Him on my side or get right with Him  - I already had all those things by grace through faith in Christ.  (Oh, that every person would see this wonderful grace of God on them and enjoy His acceptance freely given in Jesus!  We never have to earn or work to maintain what He has freely given us in Christ.  All who are burdened and heavy-laden from trying to live right or be righteous can come to Him and rest..)

He showed me something else, too.  He showed me I wasn't under the law and didn't even need it!  I was now under grace, which meant unconditional acceptance!  No matter how many times I failed, I wouldn't be called a transgressor because there was no law to transgress (Rom. 4:15)!  And if I was not ever a transgressor (law-breaker), then I was also not ever condemned!  This made me feel so light and free, and it was reality - I was free from the law and had been since I'd first believed.  The weight of all those "shoulds" and "musts", all those commands that I could never live up to, the burden that neither I nor anyone except Jesus could bear (Acts 15:10) was truly gone!  I had been living in the fog of performance-based thinking when all along I was free to soar in the clear blue sky with Christ!  All this time I'd been living under the old covenant in trying to make my Christian life work. I guess I'd had the Galatian Syndrome (Gal. 3:3).  I had seen the law wouldn't save me, but I hadn't understood it wouldn't sanctify or grow me up either!  It didn't produce life and it didn't maintain or manifest that life either!

Now God showed me I was out from under law completely and under grace.  In grace there is the law of liberty or law of the Spirit of life in Christ.  Now, I don't have this completely figured out, but it seems to me that the law of liberty means you are at liberty - free!  It's a law of freedom from law!  And it's a law where the Spirit of life is now operating, moving and maintaining and manifesting life from within.  To me, the law of the Spirit of life in Christ is that if I have Christ within, I am alive because of His righteousness in me and totally free from law (Rom. 8:1-2, 10).  I am righteous, not trying to get righteous.  I'm out of the Law realm and into the Life realm, for I died to the law that I might be raised to new life with Christ (Gal. 2:19-20).  Life is within me, and that is the operating force now, not an external law.  His Life, which is Love, is now my nature and compels me from within to love (2 Co. 5:14).  So all things are lawful (1 Co. 10:22-23), yet I find myself wanting to do what is beneficial to all - which is LOVE!

God is so wonderful!  It's exhilarating and a little disconcerting even to be free from law.  I am used to having exact rules on what to do and what not to do.  I've felt that those rules were keeping me in line.  Now that is gone and I'm flying free with Jesus.  Yet I can trust Him to keep me and love through me.  I've found that being free from the law doesn't promote a desire to sin in me but instead promotes confidence that God is for me and a desire to enjoy my relationship with God and love people.  Rules aren't the basis of my life anymore; He is!  Right and wrong doing (the tree of the knowledge of good and evil) has moved off center stage; He and His finished work (the tree of life) is now center stage!  He is sufficient to save me and sufficient to live the Christian life in me.

I've also noticed that whenever I start looking at myself, measuring my progress, trying to improve or stop sinning, focus on my failures, or compare my spirituality with others, things degenerate because I'm going back to focusing on doing right and avoiding wrong - Law.  I start to feel condemned and guilty and sin-conscious.  Jesus is so good to gently lift my gaze away from law and my failings and back onto Him and His finished work.  Then I start to calm down and feel my freedom again.  That's His Life in me keeping me focused on Him and on grace.

Another time I am tempted to put myself back under law is after I sin.  It's a temptation to think I must do something to get back in God's good graces or somehow straighten things out after a sin outburst.  The focus can shift from Him and His work to my failings and need to improve myself.  Once again, He reminds me that my acceptance and righteousness in Him is completely apart from the law and thus apart from my performance (Rom. 3:20-22).  It is unchanging whether I sin or not.  Thus I don't have to think I need to work to get it back - I never lost it!  I am accepted as righteous based on Christ's work alone (which stands perfect forever), not based on my keeping the law.  My right standing with God is secure!

Law couldn't give Life and it can't maintain or manifest life.  Only Life itself can do that.  Jesus is Life!  He put His life within me and He maintains and manifests that Life in and through me.  Law just doesn't enter the picture.  For we are not under law, where we must do it all, but under grace, where He does it all!

Let's enjoy the fact that we are not under law but under grace today!  We have been lifted up out of the dark clouds of performance, guilt, and condemnation;  we are breathing the pure air of grace as we fly with Jesus through the heavenlies!

                        Love to all from
May the amazing grace of the Lord Jesus Christ, the extravagant love of God, and the intimate friendship of the Holy Spirit be with all of you. 2 Co. 13:14